


It Ain't Me

by AnjaWritingsx



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec/Maia brotp, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, At first bad Parent Maryse, At first bad Parent Robert, Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Engagement, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, First Dates, First Meetings, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fraywood Brotp, Garrobane brotp, How Do I Tag, Human AU, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Hurt Magnus Bane, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Later good Parent Maryse, Later good Parent Robert, Love at First Sight, M/M, Marriage, Past Izzy/Maia, Past lzzy/Clary, Raphael/Magnus brotp, Simon and Izzy have a kid, Wedding, Wooing, dad luke, implied sex scenes, jalec brotp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2018-12-18 06:30:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11868612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnjaWritingsx/pseuds/AnjaWritingsx
Summary: They love each other. They know that. They are happily married, or at least they were.Or, a handsome stranger makes his way into Alec's life and he questions if Magnus is really the one he should be with.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVE RETURNED FROM VACATION.
> 
> And I promised I would do some writing and I did! And I give you this
> 
> Something that will tear your heart in tiny pieces,  
> Tug all your hair out of your heart,  
> Only for your heart to mend again ( I hope)
> 
> Also If you guys are interested, you can live tweet with the hashtag #ItAintMeFic! All your reactions to the sneak peeks I dropped on twitter were hilarious and I am really curious to see your reactions to this fic, so tweet, tweet, tweet! My twitter is @AnjaxNS and my tumblr is AnjaWritingsx so come scream if me if you feel the need to after reading.
> 
> Happy reading guys!

Alexander Gideon Lightwood never had an easy live.

Growing up, he discovered he got a funny feeling in his stomach whenever he looked at his adoptive brother Jace Herondale. He realized he had feelings for him when he remembered what Isabelle used to tell him what love felt like.

He also remembered how their parents reacted when Isabelle told them she was bisexual.

They had been livid and had threatened to disown her if she ever would come home with a girl. Isabelle had never taken that seriously. She had several hook ups with girls where two of them only turned into serious relationships. She had dated Maia Roberts for about two months and Clarissa Fairchild for four months. That was until Clary tearfully told her one day she had gotten feelings for Jace. Isabelle had been quite upset for some time but with the support of her big brother she managed to get through it and after a good talk with Clary’s step-father Luke Garroway, she learned to accept it and even helped Jace with setting up a date for them.

Not much later they met Clary’s best friends Simon Lewis, Raphael Santiago and Magnus Bane. There had been a spark between Simon and Isabelle from the second they met and were completely gone for one other.

But the minute Alec saw Magnus, it was like his whole world had flipped upside down. Magnus was an average tall man with caramel tinted skin and his hair was swept up in a quiff. In between the black strands of hair was a silver streak. He also wore pink eye shadow with glitter and a black blazer hugged his body in just the right places while the purple shirt he wore under it displayed his arms quite nicely.

Simply said, Magnus Bane had been down right gorgeous. And Alec had no idea how to breathe.

He was certain he jaw had been on the floor and he was staring but Magnus didn’t seemed to mind that. At all. He himself had been checking Alec openly out, not hiding the fact that he liked what he saw as a smirk tugged on his lips. When he had introduced himself, his strong hand sliding into Alec’s outstretched one, he was practically purring and Alec felt weak at the knees.

At first Magnus saw Alec just as another person to have in his bed, a quick thrill and move on. But after they all went out for drinks and he and Alec were eventually the only ones left, he realized he felt something deeper. He felt the need to get to know the other, what he’s like, he wanted to know every single detail and memorize it forever.

It scared Magnus, he hadn’t felt this in a long time. So when they both went their separate ways, they had mutually agreed to do this again sometime.

And they did. And again.

The first few times they talked about themselves, answering all the questions the other had and Magnus told him everything about his European tour he had done with Simon and Raphael.

The next few times there was mutual flirting involved, Alec had been shy and overwhelmed at first by Magnus’ flirting but he quickly grew used to it and couldn’t help himself but flatter Magnus as well.

One of their last times ended with the two of them sharing their very first kiss. It was slow and clumsy, warm and wet but to both Magnus and Alec it felt perfect. Alec had been giggling between the kisses they shared and Magnus found it absolutely endearing.

They had parted that evening with giddy smiles, pounding hearts and itching hands to just grab the other again and kiss the daylights out of them and with the promise of a future date.

And those dates happened. A lot of them. They even had double dates with Jace and Clary, though those turned out not to be a success because apparently it was a competition for Magnus and Jace to see who could charm their lover the most.

They also had double dates with Simon and Isabelle and those were more of a success. They could sit somewhere and talk the whole evening. Magnus had immediately bonded with Isabelle over beauty and hair products and Alec just enjoyed seeing his sister so happy with her new lover. And in return, Isabelle felt the same for Alec.

She noticed how Alec just glowed around Magnus and looked at him like he was his entire world. Which he probably was. Isabelle couldn’t help but be happy about the fact that her brother had found love.

Magnus and Alec’s dates eventually turned into a very committed relationship which was celebrated by the couple with their first time. Alec had been really nervous the entire evening and when Magnus had stripped them of their clothing he couldn’t help but notice that his boyfriend wasn’t into the make out session as he was. When he had asked Alec what was wrong, Alec had stuttered out he had never done this before and was just nervous. Upon the question if Alec rather wanted to wait, he got a firm head shake from the tall man. Alec wanted this, wanted Magnus, he just didn’t know __how__. Magnus had smiled and cupped his face, stroking his cheek tenderly. He had promised Alec that he would be gentle and that if Alec ever wanted to stop, they would. Alec had agreed, his stomach coiling with love for the other man, he had felt to so safe with him and trusted him with his own life.

So they ended up making love that evening and it was everything they both could’ve asked for and more.

Three years of a committed relationship eventually turned into an engagement. Magnus had taken Alec to Hawaii for two weeks to get some time off. Little did he knew that Alec saw this as the perfect opportunity to pop the question. They had just finished eating in an expensive restaurant until Alec all of a sudden had gotten up and dropped down on one knee in front of him, holding one hand tightly in his hand. He held the most heartfelt speech Magnus had ever heard, something about him being Alec’s light in his darkest times, his rock when he feels like drowning, the love of his life. Magnus didn’t remember it all anymore, he had been too busy with crying and staring in his Alexander’s beautiful hazel eyes. Once Alec asked him to marry him and opened the box, a beautiful golden band shining up at him, Magnus laughed through his tears and jumped in his lover’s arms with a teary ‘yes’. Alec had kissed him passionately on the mouth, not paying attention to all the other people in the restaurant who were cheering for them.

Three months after their engagement, was their wedding. Jace was proudly by Alec’s side as his best man and Raphael had been Magnus’ best man. Clary and Isabelle had been in charge of the entire wedding planning, of course in collaboration with Magnus and Alec themselves.

Magnus and Alec both wore golden suites, white dress shirts and black pants. Both smiled brightly when they saw each other, tears in their eyes and their hearts thundering in their chests. Their vows had everyone crying, although Raphael would deny that he had cried that day. When the priest had pronounced them husband and husband and told them they could kiss, Magnus had eagerly tucked Alec closer and swallowed his _husband’s_  laughter with a deep kiss.

Magnus and Alec have been on cloud nine ever since their wedding. They were constantly in each others personal space, placing a hand on the others leg or shoulder. Light caresses on cheeks or elbows that made their stomach flutter. Always holding each others hand when they went out and walking so closely pressed together. When one of them left for work or came home, they always shared a hello or goodbye kiss.

Alec still felt the butterflies in his stomach spasm around in his stomach pathetically whenever he looked at his husband. He didn’t know how lucky he had been.

He had the job he dreamed off, teaching history on a high school in the neighborhood. He had his amazing supportive husband and a great group of friends and family. Isabelle and him even made up with their parents after they came knocking on the door during a movie night. They had a very long but good talk and Maryse and Robert expressed they had accepted Alec and Magnus’ relationship. Tears were flowing, hugs were shared and Alec had never felt more happier then the moment when his parents had hugged Magnus and thanked them for making their son so happy.

Time flew and soon enough he and Magnus had been happily married for three years.

But times change. Love can be confusing. And love can be a bitch.

Recently there had been a new colleague at the school and for some odd reason Alec’s heart skipped a beat whenever he came into the teachers lounge or whenever he smiled at Alec in the halls.

Leo Salvador was something different. He was slightly younger then Alec, only just in the beginning of his twenties. He had piercing green eyes, brown hair that was always styled in an upwards quiff and he had a slight stubble. All the female students always swooned over him, spending their time rather staring at him then paying attention to his class.

Leo himself, however, had his eyes on one person only. Alec Lightwood.

Alec felt overwhelmed by Leo’s obvious flirting but he never acted on it. He just let it slide. He never told Magnus about it even though he knew he should. He just didn’t want his husband to worry. Alec was sure this little- whatever it was, would go away on it’s own.

Alec was just sitting in his classroom, grading papers when Leo walked in, knocking on the door.

“Well,’’ Leo purred, eyeing Alec up and down. “Aren’t you a sight for these sore eyes?’’

Alec gave him a stern look and pointed at him. “You know I’m married, Leo.’’

Leo pursed his lips. “Right. Of course. It’s late.’’ He said as he looked around Alec’s classroom as if he had never been there before. “Shouldn’t you head home to your man?’’

Alec was about to respond when Leo’s entire face just lit up. “Or!’’ He gasped. “You could join me and come other colleagues for some drinks.’’

“I can’t. Magnus--’’

“Can wait a few hours.’’ Leo said and suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. “Come on, you never hang out with us after working hours.’’

Alec nibbled on his bottom lip. Leo had a point. After work he had always gone straight home, to his husband. But that was because after work he felt the great need to be close to Magnus because he missed him after a long day.

But he indeed hadn’t spend any time with his friends recently so he had decided to drink one with them and then head to his lover’s warm arms. A soft smile appeared on his lips as he thought of Magnus and eventually got up, following Leo outside.

Big. Big mistake.

.

Magnus sat restlessly on the couch, his fingers tapping on the arm rest while his foot tapped impatiently on the floor. Alexander should’ve been here by now. He had called him saying he was getting some drinks with some friends and colleagues and that he would be home a little later. Magnus had said that it was no problem, Alexander was allowed to spend some time with his friends obviously.

But it had been two hours now and he had texted him over an hour and a half ago that he was on his way home because he missed him. Magnus would be lying if he said that message didn’t make his heart flutter.

Magnus was worried.

He had tried calling him a few times but the younger man never answered the phone. Magnus was interrupted from his daydreaming by the front door being shut to loudly and some indistinct mumbles. Frowning, Magnus got up from where he sat and walked over, watching as his husband struggled to get his shoes off while he was swaying on his feet.

“Alexander?’’

Alec, who finally managed to get his shoes off, looked up and grinned at Magnus. “Magnus!’’ He crowded happily before stumbling over to him and pressing a messy kiss against his lips. “I missed.’’ a hiccup. “You.’’

Magnus chuckled and embraced the taller, and drunk, man when he wrapped his long arms around him, burying his face in his neck.

“You smell nice.’’

Magnus shook his head fondly, his hands rubbing circles on Alec’s back. “And you smell of beer.’’

Alec hiccuped before cupping his lover’s face. “You have nice eyes.’’ He slurred.

“Thank you, my dear.’’ Magnus chuckled before guiding Alec to the bedroom. “Let’s go to bed, okay?’’

“I wanna have sex with you.’’ Alec mumbled, suddenly feeling very sleepy.

Magnus shook his head. Alcohol could make his man a little too blunt and honest sometimes. “Tell you what.’’ He said as he helped Alec getting undressed. “When you feel like it in the morning, we can have as much sex as you like.’’

Alec crawled under the silk sheets and curled in on himself as Magnus stroked his hair. “Always wanna have sex with you.’’ Alec slurred. “And babies. Wanna have your babies.’’

Magnus’ heart flutter. He knew what Alec meant, that he wanted to adopt and raise children with him. Magnus leaned down and pressed a kiss against Alec’s soft hair.

“I want that too, Alexander.’’ He whispered hoarsely. “I want that too.’’

After Magnus had showered and removed all his make up and got dressed in his pajamas, he crawled into bed next to his man, who immediately rolled over to him in his sleep. Magnus wrapped his arms around him and let sleep wash over him.

.

Waking up, Alec felt his head already pounding before he opened his eyes. Fluttering them open, he immediately clenched them shut again as the light blinded his eyes and only made his head ache worse.

The door creeked open and Magnus walked in with a glass of water and two painkillers in his hands. He sunk down on the bed next to Alec and gently stroked his back.

“Love,’’ Magnus whispered softly as he stroked Alec’s hair as he peeped one eye open to look at him. “I got you some painkillers for your headache. Come, sit up.’’

Alec grunted as he sat up, wincing. He took the two pills from Magnus’ outstretched hand and threw them in his mouth, throwing his head back as he gulped them down with water. Magnus took the glass back from Alec and smiled softly as his lover made puppy eyes at him.

“Cuddle me?’’ Alec asked softly.

Magnus laughed and went to lay down next to his husband and opened his arms, giving Alec the space to crawl in his arms and snuggle against his chest. Alec shuffled close and hummed in a satisfied manner against his lover’s chest.

Magnus stroked Alec’s hair tenderly, his fingertips scratching against his scalp in a way that always made Alec purr. “Did you have fun last night?’’

“Ugh.’’ Alec groaned. “I barely remember anything. I was supposed to get one drink with them but Leo kept coming back with shots and-’’ Alec sighed. “Was I very late?’’

“Only by two hours.’’ He chuckled. “It’s fine, Alexander. You’re allowed to have some with your colleagues and friends. And besides,’’ Magnus purred. “You are an adorable drunk.’’

He laughed as Alec blushed even more red and tried to disappear into Magnus himself, his arms wrapping tighter around him. “Oh god.’’ He moaned. “How bad was it?’’

“Well let’s see, you were stumbling around trying to get your shoes off, then clung to me like a koala, told me I smelled nice and that my eyes were very pretty and _then_  you bluntly told me you wanted to have sex with me.’’

“Oh my god.’’ Alec mumbled embarrassedly.

“There’s something else.’’

Alec frowned at the sudden serious tone in his voice and moved up when Magnus went to sit against the headboard. Mimicking his lover’s actions Magnus held both his hands tightly in his lap, licking his dry lips.

“Alexander.’’ Magnus said gently. “Last night-- You said you wanted to have babies with me.’’

Alec’s throat tightened and he swallowed, feeling his cheeks burn. “Magnus,’’ He croaked out. “I--’’

“It’s okay.’’ Magnus rushed. “If you don’t want to anymore. Or didn’t mean it--’’

“No! No, no, Magnus.’’ Alec said hurriedly, his hands coming up to cup his face. “I want to adopt children with you.’’

Magnus felt as if he lost the ability to breathe. His eyes were watering as he progressed what Alec said.

“Y-You do?’’ Magnus choked out.

Alec felt his own eyes tear up and nodded. Magnus laughed through his tears as he wrapped his arms around his neck. Alec brought one hand up to tangle it in his hair and the other one rubbed circles in his back. Magnus pulled back from the hug and pulled Alec in for a deep kiss.

“You uhm-’’ Magnus giggled breathlessly as he pulled back. “You said you always wanted to have sex with me and I said that if you still felt like it in the morning...’’ Magnus laughed. “I guess what I’m trying to ask is Alexander Gideon Lightwood-Bane. Will you make some sweet love with me?’’

Alec laughed. “Yes.’’ He giggled, before pushing his husband back against the mattress and climbing over him, smothering his laughter with a sweet, deep kiss.

.

Alec was back in his classroom after a weekend filled with loving from the love of his life. He sat at his desk, faintly smiling as this weekend played over and over and over in his head. He lifted his head up when there was a knock on his door.

“Come in,’’ Alec said, confused as to who it could be on this early hour.

The door opened and in walked Simon with Clary and Maia. Alec grinned and got up to hug them. “Hey guys!’’ He said happily.

Simon, Clary and Maia were also his colleagues. Simon teached in Music, Clary in Art and Maia in Sports.

“Hey Alec.’’ Clary laughed as he dropped a kiss to her head. Ever since she and Jace had gotten married, Alec and Clary’s bond had gotten stronger.

“What’s up, my man?’’ Simon said as he patted Alec’s back.

“Good.’’ Alec muttered before his eyes started shining. “How’s little Elise?’’

The day before Magnus and Alec’s wedding, Isabelle and Simon had announced they were pregnant and nine months later little Elise was born, who was now three years old.

“Growing up way too fast.’’ Simon sighed fondly.

Alec finally turned to Maia and gave her a hug and three kisses. “It’s been long, Maia.’’

“Too long, Lightwood.’’ Maia teased.

“Lightwood- _Bane_.’’ Alec corrected her with a smirk.

“So.’’ Clary said as she sat down on one of the desks. “How did it end up with Magnus when you got home Friday? Was he mad?’’

Alec shook his head. “Not at all. Apparently I was a funny drunk that evening.’’

“Lucky Magnus.’’ Maia snorted and Alec glared at her. “What? Whenever I am working you always turn into the pissed off drunk version.’’

“Maybe that’s because your boyfriend refuses to give me more drinks and threatens to kick me out.’’

“Raphael is not that bad.’’ Maia rolled her eyes.

“Okay!’’ Simon got in between and smiled nervously. “Maybe we should all head to our respective class rooms and prep.’’

Alec licked his lips. “Actually... I wanted you guys to know something.’’

Clary cocked her head to the side. “What’s up?’’

“Not here. I want everyone to be there.’’ Alec chuckled as Clary huffed. “Tonight, dinner at 6 pm at our loft.’’

“Cool.’’ Simon said. “We’ll be there.’’

Just then, another person stood in the door opening. “Well, well, well,’’ Leo said as he walked in, flashing everyone a grin.

Alec’s heart fluttered.

“Is there some kind of meeting I didn’t know off?’’

“There is now.’’ Maia mumbled. She had never liked Leo. She jumped down on one of the desk she was sitting on and looked over at Alec. “We should go. We’ll see you tonight Alec.’’

Alec smiled at his friends as they walked out the door and turned to Leo with raised eyebrows. “Don’t you have work to do?’’

“I just wanted to asked you something.’’ Leo smiled innocently. “Friends and I are getting drinks again after work. You should come.’’

“On a school night?’’

“The students have a Sports day tomorrow. There are no classes.’’ Leo shrugged.

Alec bit his lip, trying to steady the thundering of his heart. “I can’t Leo. I have plans--’’

“Please Alec?’’ Leo asked with puppy eyes as he stepped closer and Alec knew he was a goner. “It would be so much more fun if you joined us.’’

Alec sighed and closed his eyes. “Okay.’’ He gave in. “But only one this time.’’

Leo grinned in victory as the bell rung and people started pouring into the classroom.

.

Magnus tapped his manicured fingers on the table impatiently, before checking the time again. A warm hand hand covered his and he looked at his best friend, Catarina Loss.

“Relax Magnus.’’ She smiled reassuringly. “He’s probably stuck in traffic. He’ll be here soon.’’

Magnus forced a smile before letting his eyes slide along the table. On his right sat Catarina, Ragnor, Raphael and Maia. Across from him at the other head of the table sat Jocelyn and Luke. And on his left sat Jace, Clary, Simon, Isabelle, Robert and Maryse. The seat beside him, however, remained empty.

“I hope so, my dear. This is something we need to tell together.’’

Ragnor clacked with his tongue. “So.’’ He mumbled. “What do we do in the mean time?’’

“Catch up?’’ Simon suggested. Raphael perked up.

“How’s Elise?’’ He asked Simon and Isabelle, a sparkle glowing in his eyes. He loved that little kid. “Does she miss her favorite uncle?’’

“Excuse me?’’ Jace interfered offendedly. “I think we can conclude that I’m her favorite uncle.’’

Raphael glared at the blonde. “Shut it, Blondie. No one likes you.’’

Maia glared at her boyfriend and gently placed a hand on his arm. “Be nice.’’

“Elise is doing amazing!’’ Isabelle said proudly. “She’s walking so fast already and exploring everything in the house.’’

“She’s growing up so fast. She’s just as beautiful like her mom.’’ Simon agreed, taking Isabelle’s hand in hand and squeezing it. Isabelle smiled lovingly at him before giving Raphael and Jace a stern look.

“And she misses you all.’’

Magnus smiled and they talked for awhile before they finally let the worry settle in.

“Okay, this is not funny anymore.’’ Clary whispered as she eyed Alec’s empty chair. “Where is he?’’

She looked at Jace with scared eyes before leaning into him, him resting his chin on top of her head so she wouldn’t see the worry mirrored in his eyes. Robert glanced at his watch again and shaking his head.

“He’s two hours late. This is nothing for Alec.’’ He sighed out. “He should’ve been here by now, he would’ve called if he was running late.’’

Magnus had gotten up from his place half an hour ago and was now pacing in circles. Catarina, Ragnor, Raphael and Maia kept their eyes on him, worried for both their friends.

“He’s not picking up.’’ Isabelle sighed as she tried calling him again.

“What do we do?’’ Jocelyn asked her husband worriedly. “Give him up as a missing person?’’

Luke shook his head sadly. “He’s twenty eight. We’d have to wait at least twenty-four hours before the police can do anything.’’

“We have to go looking for him.’’ Magnus said. “He could be in trouble. Maybe he’s hurt!’’

Maryse got up and walked over to him. “Don’t think like that, Magnus.’’ She whispered before wrapping an arm around her son-in-law. “You heard Luke.’’

“But we need to do something!’’ He cried out.

“Magnus.’’ Luke said reassuringly. “There is nothing we can do right now. It’s dark and cold. I’m sure he’ll come home.’’

“He could be hurt, Lucian!’’

“We don’t know that.’’ Luke said calmly. “Listen, I’ll call in and ask them to keep an eye out for tonight, okay?’’ Magnus shrugged. “I’m sorry Magnus. But that’s all I can do for you right now.’’

Magnus nodded sadly, wrapping his arms around himself as he leaned against Maryse. “It’s getting late. You should maybe go home, I bet you’re all tired.’’

Catarina, Ragnor and Raphael exchanged a quick look. “Do you need one of us to stay with you, friend?’’ Ragnor asked.

Magnus shook his head. “I’ll be fine. You guy go home and get some rest. I’ll keep you up to date.’’

Everyone nodded and they said their goodbyes, silently leaving. Luke squeezed Magnus’ shoulder.

“I’ll do everything I can for you. He’ll come home safe and sound. I promise.’’

Magnus nodded weakly. “Thank you, Lucian.’’

Once everyone left, Magnus sank down on the couch, Chairman Meow jumping on his lap. “Oh Alexander.’’ He whispered, tears stinging his eyes. “Where are you?’’

.

Magnus awoke to the sound of the front door being closed and he shot up from where he had fallen asleep on the couch. Chairman Meow, who had been peacefully napping on his lap, raced off of him with an offended meow.

Frowning, Magnus got up and walked over to see who had gotten into his loft. There he found Alec, untying his boots and shrugging off his coat. With his throat tightening and tears welling in his eyes, he shot forward.

“Alexander!’’

Alec yelped in surprise when he felt two arms wrap around him but he laughed, wrapping his arms around his man. “Hey.’’

Magnus pulled back, glaring at Alec through his tears. “You asshole! Where have you been? We were all worried sick!’’

Alec dropped his smile, looking down at the ground. “Magnus, I am so sorry.’’

“Where have you been?’’

Alec took a deep breathe. “Out. Drinking with some colleagues. But I promise you, I really wanted to drink only one this time.’’

Magnus clenched his jaw. “You went out drinking? While our family waited for you so we could tell the news we were going to adopt?’’

“That’s not all.’’

“Oh brilliant! What else did you do?’’

“I went home with someone.’’ Alec cleared his throat but Magnus’ heart was already thundering to the ground. “With Leo. He kept ordering shots and.. things.. got out of hand.’’

Fear washed over him like a bucket of ice, clenching his hands he asked; “How out of hand?’’

“Magnus.’’ Alec looked at him with such regret that Magnus felt like he was going to be sick.

“Oh my god.’’ Magnus hissed as the built up tears finally spilled over his cheeks. He stumbled back from Alec. “You slept with him.’’

“No! No!’’ Alec shook his head wildly. “Magnus, it isn’t like that! We-We just kissed some-’’

Magnus let out a cold laugh. “Like that’s any better! You cheated on me! After everything!’’

“Magnus...’’ Alec choked out as his own tears started rolling down his cheeks.

“After we talked about raising a family?! I--’’ Magnus shook his head as a sob escaped his lips and his body trembled.

Alec went to wrap his arms around him but Magnus tensed up and wiggled himself out of his grip, turning around to push Alec back.

“Get out.’’ Was his icy reply.

“Magnus, please. It meant nothing.’’ Alec whimpered.

“I don’t want you here!’’ Magnus screamed. He marched over to the door and yanked it open. He then grabbed Alec by the elbow and tugged him out of his loft and into the hallway. “Get! Out!’’

“Magnus, wait!’’ Alec cried and scrabbled up from the ground, only to see Magnus slamming the door in this face.

Magnus slid down the door, tears spilling over his eyes as he tried to stifle his sobs. Alec Lightwood had marched into his life and now he had shredded his heart into tiny pieces and stomped on them. He grabbed his phone and called the one person he needed at the moment.

“Cat...’’ He sniffled once the person picked up.

Unbeknownst to Magnus, Alec stood on the other side of the door, his head resting against it, his fist next to his head as he listened to his lover’s heart wrenching sobs he tried to muffle.

Alec’s own heart was in pieces. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. Eventually, with a sniffle, he pushed himself away from the door and left the complex with his head hung low, trying to hide that he was crying as his feet carried him through the city.

.

“I’m an idiot.’’

Jocelyn glanced worriedly at the tall man sitting at their table. She put a steaming cup down in front of him. “Here, some calming tea.’’

Alec forced a weak smile as he blew into the cup. Clary sat next to him, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly. Jace was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.

“You indeed are.’’ He said breaking the silence.

Clary threw him a glare over her shoulder as Jocelyn gave him a stern look. Alec just kept staring at the dark liquid in the cup.

“Look,’’ Clary whispered gently. “Why don’t you tell us why you made out with Leo?’’

“I just-- I felt this attraction to him ever since he came to our school. I was-- _am_  confused. But I never attended to act on it. I swear.’’

“And Leo?’’ Luke eventually asked as he sat down next to his wife.

“I had told him I was married every time he flirted with me. I guess he figured he could never get me sober.’’

Luke seemed to catch on. “So he got you drunk.’’

Clary looked over at her step-father. “But that’s not allowed, is it? Taking advantage of someone who is drunk?’’

Luke sighed. “It isn’t if the person has at least refused once. No means no, sober or not. But, if Alec consented...’’

Alec closed his eyes, shaking his head. “I did. I kissed him back. Hell, I kissed him the second time.’’

“And now?’’ Jocelyn asked carefully. “Do you still feel something for Leo?’’

Alec clenched his jaw, looking at her so sharply that it send shivers down her spine. “Leo is dead to me.’’

The doorbell rang loudly through the house. Jace pushed himself off the wall. “I’ll get it.’’ he muttered, marching down to the door.

“Hey du--’’ Jace yelped and two seconds later an angry Raphael stormed into the living room.

‘’¡Tu!’’ He roared heatedly once he saw Alec. “¡Eres una puta!’’

Alec cowered while Luke calmly got up to shush Raphael.

“¡No me calmaré!’’ Raphael had huffed. “¡Él es suerte que no voy a rasgar su cara apagado!’’

“Raphael.’’ Luke said in a stern voice.

“¡Deberia matarte ahora mismo!’’

“Enough!’’ Luke yelled and that seemed to snap Raphael out off his blinded rage. Though he kept shooting daggers at Alec and he clenched his jaw.

“He deserves it after what he did to Magnus.’’

“Raphael.’’ Alec choked out. “I am so sorry--’’

“For what?’’ Raphael gritted out. “For cheating or getting caught?’’

“For hurting the man I love!’’ He snapped. He closed his eyes for a few minutes before getting up. “I should go.’’

Jocelyn got up as well. “You don’t have to leave, Alec. You can sleep here. You haven’t even finished your tea yet!’’

“I need--’’ Alec made a vague gesture to the door after he had shrugged his jacket on. “Air. I need air but thanks for the offer. And the tea.’’

With that, Alec brushed past Luke and Raphael and walked out into the soft summer air.

.

“Maia!’’ Magnus whined. “Give it back!’’

“Nope.’’ She said firmly. “You have had enough liquor for today.’’

Magnus slumped in his seat with a grimace as she walked to the kitchen with his bottle and glass, dumping the contents in the sink.

“Talk to us, old friend.’’ Ragnor said softly.

“About what?’’ Magnus groaned, turning his head to look out the window. “About how Alec apparently didn’t love me at all and made out with someone else behind my back?’’

“Magnus.’’ Catarina sighed. “If I know one thing, it’s that Alec loves you more then anything in the whole wide world.’’

“And he shows that by cheating on me?’’ Magnus said sharply. “You’re right. Husband of the year.’’

Catarina rolled her temples at her best friends sarcasm. Sometimes there was just no way to get through to him.

“We were supposed to adopt children.’’ Magnus now said in a small voice while his friends stared at him in shock. “That’s what we wanted to tell you all yesterday. We were going to adopt.’’

Magnus now stood in front of the window, his arms wrapped tightly around himself as he watched the rain hit the window. “We were supposed to start a family.’’ He choked out as the the first tears rolled down his face. “We were supposed to live happily ever after.’’

“I am sorry, my old friend.’’ Ragnor said softly.

Magnus quickly whipped away his tears. “Where even is Raphael?’’

Maia sighed out loud. “I think he’s on his way to kill your husband.’’

.

Alec had been roaming Brooklyn all night. He was just wandering the streets, hands tucked into his jacket, the soft, fresh summer breeze going through his hair. He needed space in his head, it was chaotic in there after everything. He felt so lost. He couldn’t go home, he knew Magnus wouldn’t want to see him. Besides he was sure Raphael would come for his head.

“Alec!’’

Lifting his head in surprise, he saw Jace’s head poking out of the cab. “Dude, what are you doing? Just get in!’’

And that’s how Alec found himself waking up on Clary and Jace’s couch in their loft. He sat up, stretching as Clary just walked out of the kitchen, her red hair bounded up in a high ponytail and the apron she wore covered in flour. She gave Alec a soft smile.

“Good morning, sleepy head. I am making pancakes.’’ She nodded towards the kitchen. “Do you want some coffee?’’

Alec had silently nodded and pushed himself off the couch, following her to the kitchen while rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He sat down at the kitchen table and forced a smile as Jace offered him one, setting a mug down for him.

“Good morning, buddy.’’ Jace smiled as he layed the news paper down. “Have you slept well?’’

Alec took a sip off his coffee, his eyes squinting at the bitter taste. “Sort of.’’ He mumbled.

“Do you want syrup on your pancakes?’’ Clary called over her shoulder.

Alec’s hands twitched. “Stop being so nice to me!’’ He bellowed.

Clary looked at him with wide eyes, her hands freezing where she was about to lay a freshly baked pancake on top of the others. Jace frowned, eyeing his brother carefully.

“You should hate me for what I did! Not invite me over to sleep or bake me pancakes! You should be yelling at me! You should hate me! I hate me! And Magnus-’’ Alec raged heatedly, before tiredly sinking back down on his seat, covering his face with his hands. “Magnus hates me.’’ He choked out.

Jace reached over the table and placed a hand on his arm. “Buddy. Magnus doesn’t hate you. And we don’t hate you either.’’

Clary slowly sat down next to Alec, carefully placing a flour covered hand on his shoulder. “What you did was stupid. You made a mistake and a big one at that. But if you want to make things right you need to set it aside for now. You need to earn Magnus’ trust back. And that’s not going to be easy, but it will be worth it. Magnus loves you. And you love him.’’

Alec blinked at her, before letting a genuine smile creep onto his face and he startled Clary by cupping her face and kissing her on the forehead. “You are a genius.’’ Was all he said before jumping up.

“What did she do?’’ Jace asked confused.

“Wake me up. I love Magnus and I am going to win him back instead of feeling sorry for myself.’’ Alec said, shrugging his jacket on. “Enjoy your pancakes!’’ He called over his shoulder as he ran out the door, slamming it behind him.

.

_“Who’s waking up to drive you home, when your drunk and all alone?_

_Who’s gonna walk you through the dark side of the morning?_

_It ain’t me._

_It ain’t-- _’’__

Magnus slammed the radio off with a huffed ‘Not today, Selena’. He was curled up on the couch with Chairman Meow, thoughtfully scratching him between the ears.

“Seems like you’re the only one who loves me.’’ Magnus mumbled. Chairman Meow blinked at him, purring. Magnus smiled. “Well, I love you, too.’’

He looked over at one of the picture frames standing on the side table, his and Alec’s smiling faces staring at him. With a clenched jaw, Magnus turned his head away.

It hurt too much.

It hurt to see how happy they had been. He wished none of this had ever happened. That Alec, __his Alexander__ , hadn’t gone and cheated on him.

But he had.

And Magnus was more then heartbroken about it.

He looked up as someone knocked on the door. Carefully, he moved Chairman from his lap, who had hissed in protest and then scurried off towards the kitchen, as Magnus made his way to the door. He frowned however at the person standing on his doorstep.

“What do you want, Alexander?’’

.

Alec was feeling so courageous when he had knocked on the door, but now that he saw Magnus standing there with a frown featured on his pretty face, all his courage had sunk to his feet.

“I-- Uh--’’ Alec had stuttered out. Magnus raised his eyebrows. “I want to talk to you. Figure this out. Figure us out.’’

Magnus had rolled his eyes and walked away from the door, straight over to his liquor table. Seeing as Magnus had left the door open, Alec saw that as his invitation to come inside, so he did.

Magnus wrapped one arm around himself, the older holding the glass to his lips. His brown eyes observed Alec as he took off his boots and took a few steps closer before folding his hands behind his back. Magnus couldn’t help but notice that he looked like an amateur soldier who was awaiting commander’s orders. It also didn’t help that he looked incredibly stunning.

“Drink?’’ Magnus offered him in an attempt to break the awkward silence.

“Uhm, no. Thank you.’’ Alec declined politely before closing his eyes. “Magnus, I love you.’’

Magnus, who now had his back turned to Alec, sharply turned around, his eyes glaring. “Don’t.’’

“But I do.’’ Alec persisted. “Whatever happened with Leo... It was a mistake. A really dumb and drunken mistake and you have no idea how much I regret it.’’

“Why?’’ Magnus snapped. “Because you got caught?’’

“No.’’ Alec said firmly. “Because I hurt the one person I love the most. And I vowed that I wouldn’t. Ever.’’

Magnus fell silent, clenching his jaw and turning his back to Alec again.

“Magnus-’’

“Maia needs me at Hunters Moon.’’

“Hey.’’ Alec gently gripped his arm as he brushed past him. Magnus immediately ripped his arm back as if Alec’s touch had burned his skin.

“Don’t touch me!’’ Magnus shouted. “You do not get to touch me! Not after-’’ Magnus choked out, his arms coming up to wrap around himself again. It was a way to protect himself. From getting hurt again. From Alec.

“Magnus.’’ Alec whispered breathlessly. Magnus wiped across his eyes.

“I need to go.’’ He muttered in a cold voice. “We’ll talk tonight.’’

Magnus twirled around gracefully after that and marched out of his loft. Alec let himself fall down with a sigh. Chairman Meow crawled up into his lap and Alec absentmindedly crawled him in between his ears.

“I fucked up, Chairman.’’ He breathed. Chairman meowed, causing him to chuckle weakly. “You think so too, huh?’’

.

“So he just... showed up?’’ Maia asked as she cleaned a few glasses. Magnus stirred his martini slowly.

“Yeah. He said he wanted to talk.’’ He shrugged.

“Iré allí y hablaré con él. Con mis puños.’’ Raphael muttered. Magnus threw him a dark glare.

“You will do no such thing.’’

Raphael slammed his hand down on the bar, causing both Maia and Magnus to jump. “¡Por el amor de Dios!’’ He shouted. “Why do you keep defending him?!’’

“Because I love him!’’ Magnus shouted back. “I love him, I still do! I know you want me to dump his ass but we are married! We promised each other for better or for worse and I intent to keep that promise.’’

Raphael and Maia glanced at each other. “So.’’ Maia said. “You believe you two are going to be alright?’’

Magnus sighed tiredly, his anger washing away. “I honestly don’t know, Maia.’’

.

__“_ Have you completely lost your mind!? _’’__

Alec held the phone away from his ear as he heard his sister rage against him on the phone. When a silence fell he brought it back to his ear.

“Are you done?’’

 _ _“_ I just don’t get you! _’’__  Isabelle complained. “ _You have this amazing husband. And you cheat on him. _’’__

“Yes, Izzy!’’ Alec snapped. “I was there, you don’t have to give me a full recap.’’

“ _Why didn’t you tell me?’ _’__ Isabelle asked him hurt. “ _I had to hear it from Clary. I am your sister, Alec.’ _’__

Closing his eyes, he let out a long sigh. “I know, Iz. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It’s just not something I am very proud of.’’

__“_ I can imagine. _’’__

“Iz.’’ Alec said softly. “Do you think he’ll ever forgive me?’’

Isabelle went silent for a while. “ _He loves you._ ’’ She reassured him. “ _I think you two will be just fine.’ _’__

“Thanks.’’ Alec mumbled. “I love you, Iz.’’

_“I love you, too, big brother. _’’__

.

Magnus opened the door to his loft only to be greeted by the delicious smell of roasted chicken and roasted vegetables. He sighed, walking into the kitchen, ignoring the pathetic fluttering of his heart because Alec stood there, cooking in an apron. Alec turned his head and offered Magnus a small smile.

“Hey.. you are home already.’’

Magnus noticed that he was hugging himself again. His own heart clenched as he realized he did it to protect himself from Alec.

“Yeah.’’ He said curtly. “You wanted to talk?’’

Alec nodded slowly. “Yeah. Can we talk over dinner?’’

Magnus gave a quick nod and went to deck the table in silence as Alec continued to finish the food. He kept glancing over at the shorter man, his heart tugging painfully in his chest.

He missed him.

Ten minutes later they found themselves sitting across from each other at the table, eating in silence. Alec painfully thought about it used to be.

Sitting very close together, always placing a hand on the others arm or leg. Always giggling and laughing, listening to the others day, feeding each other and soft, loving kisses.

“So,’’ Magnus said in his usual cold voice. “Talk.’’

Alec layed his knife and fork down and took a deep breathe. “Magnus, I am so sorry. So fucking sorry. I want to make things right. I just know that whatever there is between us... it’s not gone. I want to win back your trust and your heart. Step by step. As long as it takes.’’

“And what do you want me to do?’’ Magnus asked him directly.

“Nothing.’’ Alec insisted. At Magnus’ confused’ look he elaborated. “I made the mistake, I am going to do everything- __anything__  to fix it. But you get to decide the pace of how things are going to go. Or...’’ Alec hesitated. “If you decide you want to give up on me- on _us_.. I won’t stop you.’’

Magnus bit on his lip. “And for how long do you think you can keep this up?’’

“Until I have every ounce of your trust back.’’ Alec said, staring Magnus intensely in the eye. “And you love me again.’’

Magnus studied Alec carefully before leaning back, not stopping the small smile from slipping on his face. “Okay then.’’ He had whispered. “Woo me, Lightwood.’’

And wooing Alec did.

Alec figured it wouldn’t be easy, seeing that if he even came a little too close to his lover, the older man would tense up and take a step away from him.

So he started simply. Every single day he told Magnus he loved him. It didn’t matter that the other man never said it back, he didn’t have too. Alec needed to let him know he was the only one he would ever love. He told Magnus when he woke up, when he or Magnus left for work and when they went to sleep.

As for sleeping, Alec did that on the couch. He didn’t even use the spare bedroom. When Magnus had asked him about it one day, he had simply said that he wouldn’t allow himself to sleep comfortably if he couldn’t sleep in Magnus’ arms.

It was a few weeks later they both realized Magnus had stopped tensing up whenever Alec came close to him. So Alec, very slowly and carefully, placed a hand on his back. Magnus felt his stomach flutter at the touch and the skin tingled warmly after Alec had pulled his hand back.

Alec saw that as a good sign. Now every time before he left for work, he placed his hand in that exact same spot on Magnus’ back and told him he loved him.

After a month, Alec noticed Magnus let him touch his arm, stroking the skin. Magnus tried to hide the effect Alec had on him. From then on, he touched Magnus’ arm tenderly instead whenever he told him he loved him. Magnus didn’t object.

Two months later he could successfully touch his lover’s elbow. He even came with a bunch of flowers every Friday. When Alec had given them to Magnus and turned his back to him to take his jacket off, Magnus smiled fondly and sniffed at the bouquet.

After three months Alec’s hand traveled up to Magnus’ shoulder, his thumb gently caressing his neck which caused Magnus to shiver, although he tries his best not to let Alec show.

After four months Magnus couldn’t help the way his lips curled up in a smile whenever Alec gently caressed his neck and whispered another I love you. And Alec could tell from the way Magnus’ eyes sparkled he felt the same way.

It gave him hope.

After five months Magnus nuzzled into Alec’s palm before it even got the chance to touch his cheek. Both their hearts were pounding loudly in their chests, their eyes holding silent conversation they both hadn’t said out loud yet. But Alec knew that when he whispered ‘I love you’, Magnus’ eyes silently told him ‘I love you, too.’

It was now six months later and Magnus and Alec were having drinks on the couch, talking and laughing.

“He didn’t.’’ Magnus hiccuped.

“Yup.’’ Alec chuckled. “Jace got served with lukewarm coffee in his face and her boyfriend ready to beat him up.’’

Magnus shook his head. “Oh. Poor Jace.’’

Alec grinned, taking another sip of his drink, the music on the radio getting his attention. He put his glass down on the table and took Magnus’ glass as well, putting it next to his on the table, ignoring Magnus who protested. He got up and stuck his hand out to Magnus.

“Dance with me.’’

Magnus grinned, his eyes glowing as he took Alec’s outstretched hand. “With pleasure.’’

They danced slowly to Photograph by Ed Sheeran, both had one hand on the others waist, the other hand firmly grasped by their lover. Heads were pressed cheek against cheek, eyes closed as they savored this moment and danced slowly.

“I love you.’’ Alec whispered lovingly in his ear, causing goosebumps to arise on Magnus’ neck and arms.

“I love you, too.’’ He whispered back hoarsely. Alec very slowly pulled his head back to look his husband in the eye.

“You said it back.’’ Alec said, his chest rising and falling happily as hope filled his body. He swallowed, his throat suddenly feeling very dry. “Does that mean-’’

“Alexander.’’ Magnus cupped Alec’s face with such a loving smile that it lit Alec’s heart on fire. “I forgave you a long time ago.’’

And just like that Alec lost the ability to breathe. He didn’t know what to say. So he gripped Magnus’ shoulders and did the next logical thing.

He kissed him.

He kissed him like he never kissed him before. Magnus wrapped his arms around his neck, kissing him back just as passionately. Their hearts tugged happily in their chests. They were home.

It felt so much like their first kiss and it was the best feeling in the entire world. They started stumbling backwards, to Magnus’- no _their_ bedroom.

“Wait.’’ Alec panted. “Are you-’’

“Shut the hell up and make love to me.’’ Magnus breathed heavily and eagerly tucked his husband closer again, kissing him hard.

Their tongues battled for dominance. Along the way to the bedroom they left a trail of clothes. They giggled as Alec stumbled about trying to get his shoes off.

This was what he had missed so much, Magnus thought as two strong arms pushed him down on the bed. He had miss this a lot. Magnus closed his eyes as he felt Alec kiss up his chest, moaning in pleasure. He felt himself get lost in their love and pleasure.

No regrets.

.

After multiple rounds of making sweet love, Alec layed against Magnus’ chest, playing with his husband’s ring he wore every night to bed.

“So,’’ Alec said casually, causing Magnus to hum. Alec got a playful twinkle in his eyes. “How about adopting kids?’’

Magnus’ grin grew before he laughed out loud, it sounded so happy and carefree. He threw himself in his husbands arms as they laughed and shared sweet kisses.

The end.


	2. Closure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is for everyone who have asked for Closure!  
> This takes places between the third and fourth month after the Alec/Leo accident happened!
> 
> I hope this gives you all the closure you guys need! <3

Alec leaned against the doorpost as he stared at his beautiful husband who moved around the kitchen so flawlessly. It had now been three months ever since _the mistake_ , as Alec referred to it whenever he talked about it, between him and Leo had happened. Things were far from perfect between Magnus and him but they were working on it. Alec didn’t care how long it would take, he would never stop proving to Magnus how amazing he was and how much of an idiot he himself had been.

Magnus glanced in his direction and quirked an eyebrow. “Enjoying the view, Alec?’’

“You know I do,’’ Alec sighed lovingly moving to grab his bag for school. “I should get going. I’ll be home by four pm, alright?’’

“Alec, you’ve always told me that and have always come home right on time these last few months. I think you can stop telling me when you’re coming home now.’’

Alec shook his head and stepped closer to his husband. “No. I want you to know where I am every single minute of every single day. There’s nothing I have to hide from you.’’

Magnus fondly rolled his eyes and smiled small when Alec placed his hand on his shoulder. Magnus had allowed his husband to touch him there just a week ago and every single time it felt like an accomplishment to Alec.

“I love you,’’ Alec whispered as his thumb caressed his skin. “I’ll text you if I’ll be later okay?’’

“Hmm.’’ Magnus hummed, then nodding his head to the door. “Go on then, you’re gonna be late.’’

Alec smiled and grabbed his coat and scarf, putting those on and then waving at Magnus before leaving through the door. He still had no idea how Magnus kept up with him.

* * *

 

The rain was pouring down on him as soon as he got out of his car. He ducked his head and made a run for the entrance where Maia was holding the door open for him. He exhaled when he was inside and ran his hand through his slightly wet hair.

“Thanks.’’ He muttered. “Man the weather is horrible these last few days.’’

Maia hummed, following Alec to the teachers lounge. “It sure has been. But I’ve also been wondering how Magnus and you have been doing.’’

“Slowly but surely we’re getting better. I don’t mind it one bit, I know it’s my own stupid fault that I caused this mess. And even when the day comes he’s willing to forgive me or move forward with me, I’ll never stop telling him I love him daily.’’

Maia pursed her lips as she watched Alec. “You really are more then a pretty face.''

Alec sat down next to her and chuckled. “What’s that supposed to mean?’’

“It means that you are not like any other man out there who has cheated on their partner. Most of the man would make the same promises as you at the beginning but after a week would get fed up with the lack of intimacy they would receive. You’re not like that at all, at least not from what I have heard from Magnus and what you told me so far. You’re different, you actually own up to your fuck up and don’t care you two haven’t kissed or had sex in those past months, nor do you show any intentions of wanting to do that. That’s... good. I’m surprised about your effort.’’

Alec smiled modest and glance down. “I know for sure now that he’s my one and only and- I just can’t believe he’s giving me the chance to fix this. It’s not something I want to take for granted, I want him to know it means everything to me and I don’t want to push things.’’

“And have you talked to Leo in these past months?’’

Alec grimaced. “No. I am avoiding him like the plague.’’

Maia send him a look. “Alec, let me tell you one thing. He’s not going to stop chasing you if you don’t tell him to fuck off and leave you alone. You need to show him that he really is dead to you like you claimed he is. He needs to hear it from you or he will continue to bug you. And you’re going to have to face him at one point.’’

Alec bit the inside of his cheek, his lips forming a thin line as Maia smiled small at him before getting up and making her way to the gym to start preparing. Alec got up to move to the coffee maker. He needed some caffeine in his system. Just then the door of the lounge opened, Alec’s movements freezing when he heard the voice of the one person he never wanted to see again.

“Alec. Hi.’’ Leo sighed out in relief, a smile forming on his face. “It has been a while... I texted you a few times but they didn’t seem to go through...’’

Alec clenched his jaw. In the corner of his eye he saw Simon cautiously walking inside, his eyes shooting back and forth between Leo and Alec. “You don’t know when to take a hint, do you?’’ He spat and turned around to look at Leo with hard eyes.

“What do you mean?’’

“Leo, come on. Are you really this _stupid_? I’ve been avoiding you for months, blocked your number. No shit your texts aren’t coming through and you _still_ think I am interested in you?’’

“But that night at the bar- I-It meant something-’’

“No! Leo!’’ Alec shouted. “It meant _nothing _.__   _You_  mean nothing to me. What happened was nothing but a big dumb mistake. A fuck up. And it will never, _never _,__ happen again. I almost fucked up the best thing in my life because of it! I love **my husband**  and we are going to work things out, even if it takes a million years. I want nothing to do with you! Why can’t you understand that? Magnus is and always will be the love of my life.’’ Alec shook his head. “You’re dead to me.’’

Leo gasped and tried to move closer to him but Simon was faster and gripped his arm tightly, preventing him from walking closer. “Alec, please-’’ He choked out.

“Stay the hell away from me.’’ Alec spat, grabbing his coffee and then patting Simon’s arm. “Let’s go, Si.’’

* * *

 

Clary, Simon and Maia were sitting around Alec’s desk in his classroom with their lunch. After Simon had shared the intel that Leo had approached Alec, and Alec had told him, they decided to spend their breaks with him, just in case. They were sure Leo didn’t like to make a fool of himself in front of a handful of colleagues, if he even dared to show his face to Alec again.

“He totally crushed all of his hope in a pile of dust. You should’ve seen Leo’s face.’’ Simon laughed.

Alec chuckled and blushed. “Stop it, Si.’’ He muttered.

“I have to admit, Lightwood.’’ Maia smirked. “I didn’t know you had it in you. I am impressed.’’

“You don’t have to be so modest, Alec. You truly are putting your whole heart into it and showing Magnus you’re all in. I think that’s beautiful.’’ Clary said smiling.

“I know.’’ Alec sighed as he moved his food around. “But as I said. I don’t want to take it for granted. I’ve been lucky to be getting a second chance and I never want to hurt him ever again.’’

“We’re so proud of you.’’ Simon said softly and placed his hand on his shoulder. “And Magnus might not be ready to admit it yet but I am sure he’s proud of you, too. He loves you so much, Alec.’’

“I know.’’ Alec whispered. “That’s why I need to do this. I need to make it up to him, show him that I love him just as much as he loves me.’’

Clary got up and circled his desk, moving to hug him from behind. Alec smiled as he red hair tickled his ear as she rested her head on his shoulder, turning his head to press a kiss against hers. He was thankful for his friends that were so supportive, even if he himself felt like he didn’t deserve them. But most importantly, he didn’t deserve Magnus or his love.

At the end of the work day, Alec rolled his stiff neck as he made his way to his car. He just wanted to go home and talk to Magnus, tell him all about his day. He wanted to sit on the couch with him, as close as Magnus would allow him and stare in his gorgeous dark brown eyes and hear all about _his_  day. Alec smiled at the thought of husband and his heart fluttered pathetically. He was such a lovesick fool.

“Alec! Wait up, please!’’

And just like that Alec’s smile dropped of his face and his heart dropped. _God please no _,__  Alec thought as he threw his head back in irritation. Leo ran over and moved to place his hand on his shoulder but Alec just as quickly swiped it off.

“Fuck _off_ , Leo!’’ Alec snarled. “I thought I made myself pretty clear this morning.’’

“Please, we can figure this out.’’ Leo whimpered.

“There is nothing to figure out! You need to leave me alone! You are nothing to me. _Nothing _.__  I don’t understand why you can’t understand that. I can’t look at you anymore, Leo.’’

“I know you felt the same!’’ Leo whined. “It’s all because of your pathetic excuse of a husband-’’

Alec’s bag dropped to the ground and he twirled around so fast Leo barely had time to blink. He seized Leo by the collar and stared at him with such angry eyes Leo let out a squeak, his eyes widening in fear. “ _What_  did you just say about _my husband_?!’’

“N-Nothing.’’ Leo whimpered out.

Alec clenched his jaw. “Don’t you talk bad about Magnus  _ever again_! He’s more of a man then you will ever be. Listen, I’m not a violent person but when you disrespect my loved ones, that’s when you are pushing it. One more word, _one_ more word and I will not hesitate to give you a black eye. It’s thanks to you coming into my life that it’s a mess. And I will not let you mess it up even more. I’ll tell you one more time; stay the hell away from me. Did I make myself clear?’’

Leo nodded and whimpered when Alec shook him with a growl. “Answer me!’’ He sneered. “Did I make myself clear!’’

“Yes! Yes, Alec!’’ He cried out, his entire body now trembling in fear.

Alec let go off him, pushing him away from him. “Get the hell out of here. And never come near me or my friends ever again.’’

Leo almost tripped over his own legs as he tried to flee away as soon as possible. Alec sighed and got in his car, running a hand over his tired face. He then started the car and made his way home.

That night, Alec couldn’t sleep. He kept twisting on the couch but sleep failed to take him under every single time. Groaning he threw his legs off the couch and got up, and patted his way to the kitchen on bare feet. He grabbed a mug and some milk, warming it up and setting at the kitchen island once it was done, blowing the hot liquid before taking a gentle sip. He pondered over everything that happened and let the tears that stung his eyes spill over.

He furrowed his eyebrows when he heard sounds coming from the master bedroom and a few second later was greeted with a sleepily looking Magnus rubbing his eyes as he shuffled into the kitchen.

Upon Magnus seeing Alec’s wet eyes and red nose he let out a soft sigh. “I guess you couldn’t sleep either tonight huh?’’

Alec sniffled and shook his head. He then gestured to his mug. “Do you want some warm milk? Izzy always says it helps her when she can’t sleep.’’

Magnus shook his head with pursed lips and moved to sit next to him. “I prefer something stronger but I think I’ll pass this time.’’ He sighed. “Is the whole stuff with Leo keeping you awake?’’

Alec nodded and rubbed his nose dry. “Yes- Well no, that’s not what’s keeping me up. I don’t regret saying the stuff I told him. It’s just, everything that happened in the past few months.’’ His throat tightened again and he look at Magnus with teary eyes. “Why are you even still with me?’’ He whimpered. “I’ve been such a bad husband, I damaged your trust in the worst way possible and still-’’ Alec hiccuped and shook his head. “You deserve better then me.’’

Magnus sighed and slowly put his hand over Alec’s, stroking it gently. “Yes, you hurt me in the worst way possible. But somewhere deep down I feel that we can work through this. I __want__  to work through this. Together. And I know that’s what you want, too. I mean after all the effort you’ve put into us these past three months and never complained one bit.’’ He trailed off with a fond chuckle.

Alec giggled through his tears and moved to wipe his cheeks dry. “You are unbelievable, you know that? Like, in the best way possible. I love you so much it’s insane.’’

Magnus smiled and squeezed Alec’s hand. “You know, I think it was very sweet how you defended me against Leo. That really meant a lot, Alexander.’’

Alec’s heart skipped a beat and he smiled. “Anytime,’’ He whispered fondly. “You are my world, Magnus Bane. And I love you.''

Magnus’ eyes twinkled before he yawned. “I guess I am heading back to bed.’’ He looked at Alec and played with his fingers. “Don’t make it too late, Alexander.’’

Alec shook his head and lifted his mug. “I am finishing this and then I am heading to bed as well. Well, the couch.’’ He chuckled.

“You know you can just use the spare bedroom-’’

“Magnus.’’ Alec said playfully. Magnus shook his head and lifted his hands.

“Okay, okay.’’ He muttered with a smile. He walked back to the door and turned around again. “Goodnight, Alexander.’’

“Goodnight, Mags. I love you.’’

* * *

 

“You threatened to _punch_  him?’’ Maia cackled loudly, throwing her head back and clapping her hands. “Yes! Yes, Alec!’’

Alec chuckled and shook his head at her antics. “Well at least he got the message. You should’ve seen how fast he turned away and practically ran the other way when he saw me.’’

“Well at least he won’t bother you anymore.’’ Simon smiled relieved. “We are proud of you, Alec.’’

“You said that already. Yesterday.’’

“And I am saying it again now.’’

“I think Magnus is, too.’’ Clary smiled and squeezed Alec’s shoulder. “I think you two will be okay.’’

“You know what little red,’’ Alec smiled and turned to look at her with a happy gleam in his eyes. “For the first time in a while I feel like everything will turn out just fine as well.’’

Alec would not stop winning Magnus back, not ever. He would continue until he would look at him again with that loving twinkle in his eyes. He would give Magnus all the stars in the universe and not regret one thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is not here to excuse cheating, no matter how it might come across. Maybe it's just me being naïve, but I think there are people out there who cheat once and regret it possibly for the rest of their lives, like Alec. People should put hard work and effort into restoring a relationship if the both of them are willing to work on it. 
> 
> This is kind of my view on what I would do if i was in a situation like this. Everyone else can have their own opinion of course, let's just stay civil :)
> 
> Last but not least, I want to point out I never want Alec on the show to cheat or ever, that's not what I'm implying here. It's fiction, based on my opinion. Let's leave it at that. :')

**Author's Note:**

> I LOVE MY BOYS SO MUCH C'':
> 
> And I love all of you. Thank you so much for your continuous support you have given me. It means a lot to me, really<3
> 
> If you liked this PLEASE leave a kudo and a comment, because after all kudos and comments are what drive me to keep writing for you guys!
> 
> All the love xxx
> 
> Spanish translations (via google translate)  
> ¡Tu! - You!   
> ¡Eres una puta! - You're a whore!  
> ¡No me calmaré! - I will not calm down!  
> ¡Él es suerte que no voy a rasgar su cara apagado! - He's luck I am not going to rip his face off!  
> ¡Deberia matarte ahora mismo! - I should kill you right now!  
> Iré allí y hablaré con él. Con mis puños - I'll go there and talk to him. With my fists.  
> ¡Por el amor de Dios! - For the love of God!


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